Thursday, August 16, 2012

It's Not Rocket Science

So, I know I mostly blog about writing, but I have a lot of FEELS and they won't fit on twitter.

So, I've been at my job in social services for about 9 months now. It's been like coming home, and there's nothing I love more than going to work. Seeing the kids is the best part of my day, especially because a lot of them are only a few years younger than me.

It's been a great learning experience, and it's put a lot of things into perspective.

When I was 15, I met one of my best friends. She came from the North end of the city (The only people who get that reference will probably be my fellow Calgarians, sadly...) She was raised in an abusive home, with two younger half-siblings, her step-father and her mother. She suffered from numerous forms of abuse, including verbal, emotional, and physical. By the time I met her, she'd been through the child care system,  had been to foster care for periods of time, and her life was starting to settle back to normal. She had a bright future, excelled in school, spoke two languages-- and this girl could sing.

And now? Well, let's just say she still sings. Sometimes.

I love her to death, but over the years I've watched the toll the abuse has taken on her. Because that's just it-- when you abuse a child, it sets the tone for their life. Can they break out of it? Yes, but it is extremely difficult. These children only know violence, abuse, and neglect. That is their way of life. Does that make them bad people? No. But their decision making skills are sometimes questionable. For example, a wife continually returning to her abusive husband is sometimes known as Battered Wives Syndrome, and indeed, her decision making skills are impaired. The wife continues to place herself in a dangerous situation, despite so many opportunities to escape pain. This holds true with children who've grown up in an abusive home. When you've never been taught something, how can you know to do, or not to do it?

That's what gets me so angry about this whole situation. It's not fair. As a person, as a human being, what gives you the right to warp a child's life like that? What difference is this from brainwashing, really?

Maybe I'm too optimistic for this world. But if you as me, we live in a first world country. We're educated, have access to health care, and have the freedom to go to school, go to work, and believe whatever we want. So WHY is it so hard for people NOT TO BEAT THEIR KIDS. Honestly, people, this isn't rocket science.



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